Being a good daughter-in-law can be a challenging job, but it doesn’t need to be if you keep a few simple suggestions in mind.your husband was a son first!
As a new wife, it is difficult not to feel possessive and a little defensive. You want to be number one in your husband’s life, but you should remember not to put him in a position of having to defend his mother! no one wins that battle; it will only put pressure on every relationship. Will what you gain, by dividing your husband and his mother, be worth the many unnecessary heartaches for the family?
Granted, there are mother-in-laws that will do everything to prove you are not worthy of their son; you can only do so much to make a relationship with her happen. No matter what you do or hard you try to make things work, she constantly tries to demonstrate how unworthy you are. How do you deal a mother-in-law like that? Well, you could stoop to her level and try to make her look bad, but the truth is, your husband can probably see how his mother is treating you and doesn’t like it either. He may not stand up to her, for whatever reason, but he’s new to this too. Give him a break! Just keep your distance and try to keep the peace, but not at the cost of letting yourself be walked on. Don’t stoop to her level and don’t hesitate to speak up for yourself; you don’t need to set yourself up for abuse from anyone.
Don’t try to compete. He married you because he loves you. His relationship with you is different from the relationship with his mother. You’re his wife, not his mother. If she’s the queen of lasagne, give her the throne; she’s been cooking it for years and has perfected it. Create something new and perfect it. Or, better yet, find a great wine, light a candle and cook a little something up.
Do a good job taking care of her son. Part of the unnecessary strain on an in-law relationship is that your husband’s parents, particularly his mother, want to know that the wonderful care of their son that they have long provided will continue in your care. Let them see that you love him and that he has clean underwear and vegetables at least once a day. They’ll be happy and he’ll be more regular.
Keep them in the loop. Don’t cut his parents out. Take the initiative and call them with news and updates. Even though things might be a bit uncomfortable at first, remember that they are a big part of your life and making a little extra effort won’t hurt a bit (well, it won’t hurt too much).
Keep them in the loop. Don’t cut his parents out. Take the initiative and call them with news and updates. Even though things might be a bit uncomfortable at first, remember that they are a big part of your life and making a little extra effort won’t hurt a bit (well, it won’t hurt too much).
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